Upside down

This is a random post.... some ramblings from trying to clear my work.

Looking at my time table, I think uni life can be as slack as I want. Yet, I dunno why am I getting so busy. My schedules of exercising have been disrupted. I am no longer able to wake up early in the morning to do a run or make time in the afternoon to go for my swim. Whenever I plan to go for a run in the night, I would be bogged down by work that I had set out to complete but was unable to. The time table doesn't look full, but why is my time so filled up such that I have to resort to doing things the efficient way, leaving little time to ponder over problems that I am stuck at, yet still cannot clear the work. I think I am those who don't like backlog and at the same time dun want to be a schoolwork NSF. I know these ramblings are not valid because afterall, I am still a year one idiot, the load will be getting heavier. Probably I have not fully adapted to the university pace of life. Probably, my brain is still stuck in the NS times, which doesn't think so fast.

After being in school for about 10 weeks, I realised time doesn't wait for me. I started to value having time more. If money can exchange for time, I would do that. I guess I must learn to embrace the fast pace of life, like it or not. Things to be done must be done now or never. If I were to put them on hold,they will never happen. The vicious cycle of complaining having not enough time will continue. But I wouldn't compromise sleep. Haha, the body is ageing... I need at least 6 hours of sleep nowadays to function well the next day. Wonder how I could go sleepless last time and still have the energy to rush through the next day. And I guess I need to do something to my time management. In the midst of a busy lifestyle, there are always some pple that come across my mind, and these have become my motivations to move on and stop complaining to myself that I am tired or moody. Though I am a student, study is certainly not the most important thing in life. Maybe I should try working with constraints, fitting other more important stuffs into my schedules before finding time out for study.

There are so many things that I wanted to do, but for now, let me just clear my backlog first.

Botak Jones

Went with my army friends to botak jones yesterday to celebrate jy bdae at the clementi outlet. It's my third time eating at botak jones! And yesterday was the second time I ordered a cajun chicken set, plus a shared plate of large whoopass cheese fries! It funny how 1 month in university can change our conversation topics. It used to be army here army there when we had outings. But yesterday, the topic was this lectuerer sux or don't understand what that lecturer was talking or I spent 3 hours doing one question in my tutorial! There was also a significant decrease in the universal friendly gesture -F- used too. We dun use it as a punctuation anymore. More cultured now? Less 'Ah beng?' Nevertheless, despite the erosion of crude culture, we can still talk about any rubbish. Just that the rubbish topics now include maths and equations and being in an almost all guys class. No more Russel Peter's jokes!

And one hour passed like nobody's business when you are in good company. or engrossed in what you are doing.

I went home after my outing to do my tutorial which was supposed to be submitted today. I din realise that it was already 2am by the time I cleared it. As a result, I missed today's morning run which I promised myself cos' my lazy body just refused to get out of bed! I really missed going ecp to run every sat morning.

Today, on my way back from school I remembered I haven been on msn for a while since most of the time I was trying to clear my pile of work. I am not sure when did it become a 'habit' to come online. So, on my boring journey home I did some mental sums, like those sch kids having mental sums. The only difference is that I don't have an exercise book now to write it down like last time. But I think my mental sum is more meaningful than those your teachers give you, kiddos.

Assuming an average of 2h spent on msn per day.
1 Day = 2h
30 Day = 60h (awake)
= 2.5 Days (awake) -------- (1)

[ Recall: An interesting chat with my friend yesterday taught me the concept of waking days. If you sleep 10hour per day, which is about half a day, you only live about 30 waking years if your lifespan is 60 years. Sound like some chim crap, but I shall crap on. ]

So assuming you are a superman and sleep an approximately 4h per day.
Total waking hours per month = 20 x 30
= 600h
= 25 Days --------(2)

Comparing (1) and (2), percentage of waking time spent on msn = (2.5/25)*100%
= 10%

How you infer this value of 10% is up to you. Cos I have not really reflected on the 10% either. It's just out of curousity on the train that I worked out the percentage. We can't say msn is totally bad and time wasting because it's a virtual meeting place with your friends and many other advantages you can name. But we can't say that 10% is not a significant amount of time. And maybe 10% is just too much an underestimate because you might just be online for more than 2 hours and sleep more than 4 hours per day. So next time when I want to complain I dun have enough time, I should think twice whether I am a victim of time or vice versa.

Took so long to type out the maths when my mental sum only took less than 1min. Haolian my core 2 duo brain processor a bit =)

Sunday

An excerpt from a social experiment book that I was reading, which I found it interesting.

"And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy," it is written in the Book of Genesis. God devoted six days to creating heaven and earth. Then, on the seventh, the work is finished - not by building a holy place, but by creating a sacred time. Although the world was created in the first six days, its survival depends upon the holiness of the seventh. "What was created on the seventh day? Tranquillity, serenity, peace and repose." Philosopher Abraham Herschel observed: "Six days a week we seek to dominate the world, on the seventh we seek to dominate the self... In the tempestuous ocean of time and toil there are islands of stillness where man may enter a harbor and reclaim his dignity. The island is the seventh day, a day of detachment from things, instruments and practical affairs as well as of attachment to the spirit."

Beauty

Beauty as perceived by a commoner


Beauty as perceived by a knowledgeable engineer, perhaps?

Before being polluted with knowledge, we perceive beautiful as what they appear, as what it really is. A building is beautiful because it has unique designs and colourful lightings. After being polluted by Newton, we started to be able to see a building differently. We don't just see a building as what it is. We see the building as composing of arrows of forces. Beauty is not as pure as it used to be.

It's the same for knowing a person. How much do you want to know about her and yet retain your perception of her beauty? Although beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, I think that's because the beholder lacks knowledge.

To the group of friends who are watching fireworks at esplanade, the fireworks appeared so magical and they were engrossed in the moment with their mouth wide open in awe. To the person controlling the explosives, it's just the sequences of igniting the chemicals. Fireworks isn't that beautiful and magical afterall.

As we continue to advance and aquire new knowledge, and science continue to unravel the mysteries of nature, we are able to explain the phenomena of the natural world logically and systematically. Where is the beauty of the world then? The end of the rainbow is a pot of gold? Or the angels are sitting on top of the the rainbow looking at the world? Nobody is going to buy this story now. They will tell you how the sunlight and the rain formed the rainbow.

When everything can be explained scientifically, we no longer imagine things. No fantasy, no beauty. The petals of a flower don't appeal to you anymore once you can see a fibonacci pattern in there. Returning to study after two years no doubt made me appreciate studying more and appreciate what knowledge can do to the world around us. At least that was what I felt during a statics lecture on bridges in equilibrium, being able to appreciate that bridge stretching across the sea. But that's when beauty is also clouded by the balance of arrows of forces.

Maybe there will be one day when great physicists like Stephen Hawkings really discovered the unified theory that can explain all the forces of nature. Perhaps, that's where imaginations end. And beauty is deterministic.

An old Yiddish Proverb

It's good to hope, it's the waiting that spoils it.

The Ticktockman

He decides you must sleep now because if you don't sleep, you won't have 8 clock-hours of sleep before you wake up for tomorrow morning lecture. However, you lay on the bed, looking at the ceiling with countless thoughts, yet trying to fall asleep because you have to.

He decides that you only have 2 hours to get what you want on the streets. As a result, you have to shop for what you need, objectively. He doesn't allow you to see other things or stop for a drink, because he doesn't wait for you. If you don't listen to his instructions, you will be late for your appointment.

He decides you have to leave the place now, even though it's been great sitting down chatting with your friend on almost anything you can think of. He forced you to return to reality. You have to leave if not he will make you pay for the probable consquence of missing the bus. However, you left feeling that the conversation shouldn't have ended so fast.


He says that you should have him on your mind every moment. If you lose track of him you might not be able to finish your exam papers when the examiner ask you to put down your pen. You will not be able to swim fast enough. However, you realise that the more you think of him, the faster he race across your mind, such that with him around, you are never able to complete all the maths questions, never able to swim fast. When you lose track of him, the span of the moment is infinite. Your mind is on what you are doing, not on him.

He says that racing against him is productivity, and productivity is speed. In his perspective, speed is the only way to compete with an edge over others. If you are doing nothing, you are wasting away your life because he says that life is a continuum of events after events, the void of doing nothing should be avoided. But peace of the mind, clarity of thoughts, and internalisation of virtues and values are realised through comtemplation in the void.

He says you must stop writing now because its time to sleep.

Happy Birthday Singapore!

Finally, I get to watch NDP this year! Well, the past three years I have been going to Marina Bay with 29th OAC to squeeze with the crowd so as to catch the fireworks! Today, I am glad I could be a couch potato and watch the full parade from the comfort of my home!

Two years ago...

Thought bubble: A chain of malay commands, which I could't understand. The marching contingent looked cool, especially the guard of honour, majestic flag.

Two years later...

Thought bubble: Finally I understand what the hell those commands meant! The marching contingent looked cool, especially the guard of honour, majestic flag! (Its called the Colours) Recalling from my experience of being in the colour party, holding the Colours really made your right bicep so much bigger than your left one such that you need to do something to your left arm to balance up the size. When there is a breeze, endure! When there is a strong wind, you are lucky if you don't fly! When marching with the Colours, you will be cursing and swearing at that irritating sword which kept hitting against your leg. From far it looks neat and cool, from near every one is full of sweat from the Hentak Kaki. But involvement indeed made me more appreciative to the whole event.

One year ago... It is what most NSF will call Saikang (Shit Work)



Fortunately, exposure in an active unit allowed me to gained some insight to that saikang. After watching NDP this year, this quote sounds even more meaningful now.



Happy Birthday Singapore!

Simple Pleasure

I went over to zw house to stay over yesterday night after sending off wl at the airport. In the morning, I woke up to see his mum has already prepared a cup of warm soya bean milk, a cup of plain water, curry buns, and a bowl of cereal for me. It's a pretty touching sight to see. I started to recall when was the last time I had such a well prepared breakfast by my mum, which made me really miss homemade breakfast. Life nowadays have always been a rush. While I will try to prepare a sumptuous breakfast for myself if I have a lull morning, it's not the same as it being prepared by one's mum.

Memory

Memory is a form of immortality. If you make someone happy now, you'll make them happy twenty years from now by the memory of it. It keeps the past alive, and a good past is a bundle of todays well lived. Memory is the only paradise from which we cannot be driven.

Passing thoughts

I was back running at East Coast today morning! It's been some time since I ran there but the route still felt familiar and while running, some random thoughts passed my mind. So I thought maybe I would want to blog it down.

East Coast is a place which I always think its quite a distance to cycle with a mountain bike, less running it. But somehow, on a moment of impulse in choosing whether to run 21km or 42km, I signed up for the marathon last year, which forced me to run long distances and East Coast became the best place to train. I never thought I could finish running the whole stretch of East Coast. Somehow, it happened, together with running the whole stretch of Changi Coast Road that extends from the end of East Coast, which I remember I was swearing on the bike at the straight long road during Bike Hike 04. And eventually, I completed the marathon last year. All these memories of training and completing the race flashed passed while I was running today. And they did stir some ripples in my sea of thoughts: Things that I never thought I could have achieved, but did it anyway. And suddenly many examples just pop up, making this twenty years seem like an accident of events, or is it? Am I what I am today because of a series of accidental events in life? Pondering more, I thought these 'accidental events' happened because the seed of thought was planted in the first place. I did dream of running a marathon some years back.

After my morning run, looking at the morning sky and sea, I thought perhaps the story of life is how you want it to unfold. All events that can happen will happen, only if you can think of them happening.

Think to begin, Act to become.

ORD!!!

ORD LOH! I guess this is the much awaited time for a lot of us, NSFs. A time to leave the service to become a NSman. So how am I feeling today? Elated, delighted, excited, of course. But I must admit I also feel some attachment to my unit. The end always sets one thinking of the beginning. And here are some flashbacks.


Sunset

Evening

Pre-SOC

RSAF Combined Graduation Ceremony

Commissioning Parade



Thinking about it, ORD is not just about leaving the service and leaving a workplace. It's also about leaving a lifestyle I am so used to for 2 years. Its a lifestyle of military hierachy and culture. A lifestyle of chin up regimes, push ups, running around that SOC ground with extra sand cans. A lifestyle of playing pool at lot one in the evening, running around like idiots in ntu, doing stupid things and cracking jokes in the bunk, and of course not leaving out the countless fire fightings in the day. All are now the past. Can't say that all memories are pleasant, but they are definitely part of my lifestory that is worth remembering. All said, it's now time to move on back to civilian life! I love my Pink IC!